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I have recently began to think that parenthood in general
and motherhood in particular are very over rated.
I see old people in town, some of whom can barely walk.
Shuffling bravely, with their shopping. Probably, going back to an empty house.
And I think that when they were young and energetic, they
were devoting all their energies and money in trying to raising their children
and giving them the best of everything.
As mothers we sacrifice our looks and freedom and any social
life we have, in having and rearing children. We are so full of love and the
desire to protect and nurture them that we never put ourselves first. Fast forward to old age, and you have loneliness
and frailty to contend with, and no one their to hold your hand.
I know that in the East, it is drummed into you from the
moment you can understand that you must obey, respect and serve your parents. The
society is such that you can never get away the ridicule if you neglect them.
Very few, if any elderly live on their own. Sons always have their
parents living with them, and providing for them, for the rest of their lives.
As there is no social security, they do not have another option.
Thus you find very few old people living on their own, or having to go out and
shop or exert themselves.
Though having experienced this trend and finding quite it oppressive,
I would not want to impose it on my children. But I do get lonely. And though
am still fit and young enough to do what I want and keep myself busy, I wonder
about the future.
It is very sad to see and hear about thousands of older people stuck at home and suffering
loneliness. I often wonder as to what is the answer?
Is it the social security which has made us uncaring? Would
the children make a bigger effort if they had the responsibility of their parents. If we did not have the state taking care,would be more neighbourly?
Do you worry about loneliness? What do you think is the
answer? Should we as a society make more of an effort and involve ourselves a
bit more with someone who lives on their own?
Or it is all the “rubbish which happens in the third world”
and we need not bother?
Tell you what, am afraid of being a lonely old woman.