Yesterday in the “Archers” ( the long running radio drama), there was a very poignant scene. Peggy who has been widowed a year or so ago, has to have her cat put down, and when her friend Gill comes to console her, Peggy simply breakdown, she is not crying fore her cat,she is crying for Jack,her departed husband. And she sobs uncontrollably , saying “am so lonely, it seems so ungrateful to say this,when everyone has been so kind”.
I resonated with me , I too burst into tears.
It seems it was not just me,there was a huge response,and this morning Woman’s Hour, had the actress who plays Jill was on the show, She herself has been widowed a fewer years ago ,and identified with everything she portrayed as an actress.
She also said that people of our generation find it so hard to being lonely, to mourn or be sad openly,we have been brought up to have the stiff upper lip, and carry on.
It is true that once the children leave home/one retires, life suddenly becomes meaningless. I remember how movingly Atiller and Foxyman have talked in the past about losing their wives, however busy you might be, a vital component of your being is lost.
Foxyman has also lost his beloved cat recently, I was thinking of him too.
So why is it wrong to admit that you re distraught, you are lonely and you crave human companionship?
I know in the eastern societies, it is the other way round,people wear their grief as a mantle, expecting all and sundry to see and indulge them. that is tiresome and loses friends, but there has to be a happy medium?
It has also been said today that on line gambling is on rise and the highest number is women. May be because there are more lonely women than men? is this a sad state of affairs that we have so many lonely people in our country,and we are afraid not only to acknowledge our own loneliness,and when we do see a lonely person we look the other way,in case we will have to acknowledge our own.
So what is to be done? Have we any idea /solution? Are you lonely ? Or are you gong to tell us what can those who are ,do about it?